Home Work

Yesterday, at Home Depot, I bought--wait for it--a chisel.  Many chisels, actually.  (Well, three).   This afternoon, for the first time in my adult life, I used one.  It was probably the single greatest experience of my existence.

Well, no.  But our bathroom mirror/cabinet now fits flush into the wall cavity.  The wall's cavity-clogging excrudesence exists no more.  And why?  Because I own a chisel.  Excuse me: three chisels.  Because I am a man.

Thoughts On Remodeling

- Home Depot and Lowe's are not, as I had once assumed, more or less the same.  Home Depot is far inferior.  Don't go there, unless you want faucet fixtures that cost 40.00$ more than they should, look terrible, and only work with a certain brand of six-hole sinks manufactured exclusively in Slovenia.

-Instructions for coming up with name for shade of paint: take any noun.  Take any second noun (preferably one that evokes nature) or adjective with non-negative connotation.  Combine.  You have now created the name of a shade of paint.  Sierra frost.  Tuscon villa.  Spring pumpkin.  Tomato stockcar.  All are paint names, somewhere.  I promise you.

-"Trim" refers to floorboards and chair rails.  Oh, and door frames.  Maybe window frames too.  I think it's also a kind of sparrow.  I don't know.  But people like to talk about it.  Generally when they do just nod.  Agree that it should probably be white.

-I think it can also refer to a body shape?

-Toilets are rated according to statistics.  Flush power.  Flush strength.  Slugging percentage--those are the main ones.  It's kind of cool.  

-While it may, in theory, be possible to purchase a toilet for under $100, you should not do so.  Unless, that is, you want some toilet who will never even get past AAA ball.

-We have two new toilets--a Brad Ausmus level toilet, and, for our starting rotation (main bathroom), an Andy Petitte level toilet.  (The Pettite of three years ago, say).  We passed on the Tim Lincecum/Manny Ramirez level ones.  Too pricey.  And why spend all that money on one superstar?  As the Devil Rays showed, it's balance and depth at all positions that wins championships.

-Total number of miles driven between our apartment, our house, Lowe's and Home Depot in last week: 200.  

-Walt Disney makes its own line of paint.  I don't know what to think about that.