Today on the radio, I heard--in a row--the following three songs: 1) Bowie and Queen doing "Under Pressure" 2) Aretha doing "Respect" 3) and "Don't Stop Believin'".
It was the most excited I've been listening to the radio in, like, ten years. It was like...is this what tantric sex is like? But then I thought, no. This is BETTER.
Also, I just want to put out as a general statement of credo: if I ever get remarried, and I'm considering someone for a future spouse, if I found out she doesn't like Journey, then that's it. No wedding. Also, I might report her to the Feds. Because, probably, she's some kind of communist. Or something.
Monday, November 3, 2014
Wednesday, October 15, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 25
More lists.
Because you horrid people only reply to lists.
Here's the deal. Think of a band. Now consider two songs.
1) their most REPRESENTATIVE song.
2) their BEST song.
That's it.
Representative = if you had only one song to introduce an alien to this band, what would you play them?
BEST = if you had one song to represent the essence of their greatness...for any band..what would you choose?
Here are some examples.
LED ZEPPELIN
Most REPRESENTATIVE SONG: Stairway to Heaven.
Helped by being long. Encompasses the acoustic and heavy sides of the band. Has the hippie-dippie stoned lyrics, and the rock n roll bad ass lyrics. It's the band in one song.
BEST SONG: Going to California.
REM
Most Representative Song: (Don't go back to) Rockville
Best Song: Orange Crush
U2
Most Rep Song: Where The Streets Have No Name
Best Song: One
Bruce Springsteen
Most Rep Song: Thunder Road (or some other 70s anthem)
Best Song: (Streets of) Philadelphia
Because you horrid people only reply to lists.
Here's the deal. Think of a band. Now consider two songs.
1) their most REPRESENTATIVE song.
2) their BEST song.
That's it.
Representative = if you had only one song to introduce an alien to this band, what would you play them?
BEST = if you had one song to represent the essence of their greatness...for any band..what would you choose?
Here are some examples.
LED ZEPPELIN
Most REPRESENTATIVE SONG: Stairway to Heaven.
Helped by being long. Encompasses the acoustic and heavy sides of the band. Has the hippie-dippie stoned lyrics, and the rock n roll bad ass lyrics. It's the band in one song.
BEST SONG: Going to California.
REM
Most Representative Song: (Don't go back to) Rockville
Best Song: Orange Crush
U2
Most Rep Song: Where The Streets Have No Name
Best Song: One
Bruce Springsteen
Most Rep Song: Thunder Road (or some other 70s anthem)
Best Song: (Streets of) Philadelphia
Sunday, October 12, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging Day 23: On Daily Routines
My wife says the posts of mine that she likes the most are the ones about our daily routine. My mother says the same thing. So, here's a post about daily routine.
The routine we have for waking and sleeping is that the wife goes to bed first, around 10:30, and I stay up for another few hours, reading and working. When I stay up, I'm in the den. (Which has a terrible reading lamp, for which reason I end up reading less than I want to in there. But never mind that).
Before the wife goes to bed we move the Bink into the kitchen. He has a dog bed that he sleeps in. During the day, the bed is in the front room, the one with the window that looks out onto the street. From there he can survey the neighborhood and alert us -- via loud and prolonged yowling, and the grabbing of his bed by the mouth, and subsequent angry shaking of said bed -- of the approach of anyone suspicious (chiefly: the mailman, neighbors, and alien cats). Then, at night, when we watch TV with dinner, we move the Bink's bed into the TV/den room so that he's not alone in the dark of the front room. We do this b/c we've learned that if he lies in the dark during the early evening, he's less likely to sleep through the night when he's actually put in bed. So, really, we keep him in the den with us during TV/dinner so that he's around lights and noises, and can't fully sleep.
Anyway, around 10 the wife starts getting ready for bed. Bink follows her and keeps watch as she brushes her teeth and lays out her clothes and drinks her twelve shots of vodka and eats her herring. Then, when she closes the sliding door that separates the bedroom area of our house from the living room area, Bink knows it's time for him to go to bed. He ambles into the kitchen, gets in his bed, and sleeps. But during the time he's in the kitchen, in bed, I'm still in the den working, writing, reading, and eating the rest of the wife's picked-over bits of herring and vodka.
Then, when I finally go to bed, around 12:30, I silently creep to the kitchen and latch closed the baby gate that separates kitchen from dining room. In doing so, I lock Bink in the kitchen. We've tried letting him roam around the entire living quarters area at night, but inevitably, at 4 AM, he sees a cat through the back window and starts yowling and going crazy. And that's no good. (Whereas, in the kitchen, there are no windows set low enough to allow him access onto cats).
So, that's the routine. Most of the time it works fine. Though once in a while Bink, when enclosed in the kitchen by me as I creep silently toward bed, rebels. And by rebel I mean "barks loudly throughout the night, tears all the towels down from their racks and, if he's feeling jaunty, poops on the floor."
For some odd reason, he almost never rebels if I'm the one who stays up in the den. But once a week, I abstain for a day from caffeine and go to bed early. On those nights, the wife stays up later in the den. Whenever that happens--whenever she's the one who has to latch the baby gate closed on the kitchen before bed--Bink ALWAYS rebels.
The loud yowling that goes through the night can be countered, however, by means of 1) closing our bedroom door and 2) turning on my fan to high, which fan then makes a noise that sounds roughly like a Sopwith Camel lifting off for battle, and which obscures the anguished howling of the small Maltese in the kitchen.
The routine we have for waking and sleeping is that the wife goes to bed first, around 10:30, and I stay up for another few hours, reading and working. When I stay up, I'm in the den. (Which has a terrible reading lamp, for which reason I end up reading less than I want to in there. But never mind that).
Before the wife goes to bed we move the Bink into the kitchen. He has a dog bed that he sleeps in. During the day, the bed is in the front room, the one with the window that looks out onto the street. From there he can survey the neighborhood and alert us -- via loud and prolonged yowling, and the grabbing of his bed by the mouth, and subsequent angry shaking of said bed -- of the approach of anyone suspicious (chiefly: the mailman, neighbors, and alien cats). Then, at night, when we watch TV with dinner, we move the Bink's bed into the TV/den room so that he's not alone in the dark of the front room. We do this b/c we've learned that if he lies in the dark during the early evening, he's less likely to sleep through the night when he's actually put in bed. So, really, we keep him in the den with us during TV/dinner so that he's around lights and noises, and can't fully sleep.
Anyway, around 10 the wife starts getting ready for bed. Bink follows her and keeps watch as she brushes her teeth and lays out her clothes and drinks her twelve shots of vodka and eats her herring. Then, when she closes the sliding door that separates the bedroom area of our house from the living room area, Bink knows it's time for him to go to bed. He ambles into the kitchen, gets in his bed, and sleeps. But during the time he's in the kitchen, in bed, I'm still in the den working, writing, reading, and eating the rest of the wife's picked-over bits of herring and vodka.
Then, when I finally go to bed, around 12:30, I silently creep to the kitchen and latch closed the baby gate that separates kitchen from dining room. In doing so, I lock Bink in the kitchen. We've tried letting him roam around the entire living quarters area at night, but inevitably, at 4 AM, he sees a cat through the back window and starts yowling and going crazy. And that's no good. (Whereas, in the kitchen, there are no windows set low enough to allow him access onto cats).
So, that's the routine. Most of the time it works fine. Though once in a while Bink, when enclosed in the kitchen by me as I creep silently toward bed, rebels. And by rebel I mean "barks loudly throughout the night, tears all the towels down from their racks and, if he's feeling jaunty, poops on the floor."
For some odd reason, he almost never rebels if I'm the one who stays up in the den. But once a week, I abstain for a day from caffeine and go to bed early. On those nights, the wife stays up later in the den. Whenever that happens--whenever she's the one who has to latch the baby gate closed on the kitchen before bed--Bink ALWAYS rebels.
The loud yowling that goes through the night can be countered, however, by means of 1) closing our bedroom door and 2) turning on my fan to high, which fan then makes a noise that sounds roughly like a Sopwith Camel lifting off for battle, and which obscures the anguished howling of the small Maltese in the kitchen.
Monday, October 6, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging Day 22: Musical Lists II
Ha! As I'd hoped, the musical lists posts has (finally) provoked some responses. Give the people what they want, that's what I say.
A few replies to your replies....
The reason I didn't bother talking about The Stones, e.g, (as well as a lot of other bands), was because the point of the list is to treat with bands one more or less universally admires. I think it's interesting to talk about the outliers, the duds, the one or two songs by your favorite bands that you can't stand. It's even more interesting, to me, if those are songs that many other fans seem to admire. I mean, it's not so hard to find some late-career B-side that doesn't do much for you; more difficult, I think, is to find a hit from the heart of their catalog that's never, ever, seemed to you worthwhile.
So, the Stones. I'm sort of generally indifferent to them, is the thing. Sure, I have songs of theirs I like--maybe a few I love (maybe?)--but in general they don't do much for me. To me the Beetles/Stones debate is not even a contest--I think the Stones may go down in history as the most overrated band in rock music. Similarly, Elton John. I like a few of his songs, but generally I find his work saccharine and inane. (His lyrics, especially, gall me). So there's no point in me listing songs of his I don't like, because he's not an artist of whom I consider myself "a fan." That's the key issue here--being a fan. Which label, is, I know, nebulous to the point of nonsense. But, I use it nonetheless.
Though I could, if pushed, come up with criteria for fandom, as I define it. You own all of their albums, you've seen them live in concert, you can recite most or all of their lyrics by heart, you have detailed and complex opinions about their catalog, you will always follow a link on the internet if it has to do with this band, etc.
There are other bands that I really admire that, when I thought about it, I couldn't identify songs of theirs that I considered were duds. Like, U2. There's no song of theirs I can think of that really offends me--and that's always offended me, from the get-go. (Again: 'grown sick of' doesn't count. Because there are TON of U2 songs I'm sick of. All of Joshua Tree, to start. But did I love--or at least like--them once? I did.)
So that's the thing.
JWM--what's the REM song you don't like? Are there any? (Again: has to be a hit. Not track 9 from Up).
Dez, I don't know Springsteen well enough to know if the song of his you listed was really a hit/big deal. Presumably it was? I realize, of course, that with non-top 40 artists 'hit' is a vague term. But, you know. We do our best.
A few replies to your replies....
The reason I didn't bother talking about The Stones, e.g, (as well as a lot of other bands), was because the point of the list is to treat with bands one more or less universally admires. I think it's interesting to talk about the outliers, the duds, the one or two songs by your favorite bands that you can't stand. It's even more interesting, to me, if those are songs that many other fans seem to admire. I mean, it's not so hard to find some late-career B-side that doesn't do much for you; more difficult, I think, is to find a hit from the heart of their catalog that's never, ever, seemed to you worthwhile.
So, the Stones. I'm sort of generally indifferent to them, is the thing. Sure, I have songs of theirs I like--maybe a few I love (maybe?)--but in general they don't do much for me. To me the Beetles/Stones debate is not even a contest--I think the Stones may go down in history as the most overrated band in rock music. Similarly, Elton John. I like a few of his songs, but generally I find his work saccharine and inane. (His lyrics, especially, gall me). So there's no point in me listing songs of his I don't like, because he's not an artist of whom I consider myself "a fan." That's the key issue here--being a fan. Which label, is, I know, nebulous to the point of nonsense. But, I use it nonetheless.
Though I could, if pushed, come up with criteria for fandom, as I define it. You own all of their albums, you've seen them live in concert, you can recite most or all of their lyrics by heart, you have detailed and complex opinions about their catalog, you will always follow a link on the internet if it has to do with this band, etc.
There are other bands that I really admire that, when I thought about it, I couldn't identify songs of theirs that I considered were duds. Like, U2. There's no song of theirs I can think of that really offends me--and that's always offended me, from the get-go. (Again: 'grown sick of' doesn't count. Because there are TON of U2 songs I'm sick of. All of Joshua Tree, to start. But did I love--or at least like--them once? I did.)
So that's the thing.
JWM--what's the REM song you don't like? Are there any? (Again: has to be a hit. Not track 9 from Up).
Dez, I don't know Springsteen well enough to know if the song of his you listed was really a hit/big deal. Presumably it was? I realize, of course, that with non-top 40 artists 'hit' is a vague term. But, you know. We do our best.
Wednesday, October 1, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 21: Musical Lists
So I was thinking last week that if I had to name my least-favorite Bowie song, what would it be? But then, that seems too easy: you could pick one of the tracks from the second half of Tonight, say ("Borneo" jumps to mind) and you'd easily find some pretty substandard songs.
So, a more interesting question is: what's my least favorite popular Bowie song? "Popular" means, in this case, a song that's frequently on the radio, which any halfway educated musical fan would know, and which is generally liked and admired by the public at large. Basically: a song by an artist you like that a lot of other people like, but you don't. And--that you've never liked. I.e.: it's not a song you've gotten burned out on, or outgrew (e.g."Stairway to Heaven"). It's song you've always disliked--from the first time you heard it. It's the worst good song the artist has ever done.
And then I started thinking this idea of 'worst good' could extend to other bands. I mean, for any band we like, there's probably one or two or their hits, songs that many people other like, that I have never ever cared for. Right? So then I started assembling a list. And here it is: my 'worst good' songs by some of my favorite artists.
Oh--also: the songs have to be artists you generally otherwise admire. You can't pick a band whose work you generally dislike or don't really get into. (So, I'm not listing songs by The Rolling Stones or REM, e.g.)
David Bowie: "Fashion." Probably the only Bowie song where, if I hear it on the radio, I'm switching stations. Unless it's near the bridge ('listen to me/don't listen to me..."). I dig the bridge.
Led Zeppelin: "Kashmir." There's some interview where Robert Plant talks about this song represents, for him, the essence of Led Zeppelin. Bleh. For me it represents the essence of badness.
The Beetles: "Hey Jude." Not only do I like the song, I don't like the story of how the song was written. Maybe if it didn't have that endless outro (Na na na na na......) I'd like it more. But probably not.
The Police: "Can't Stand Losing You."
Neil Young: "A Man Needs a Maid." Maybe this isn't a big enough hit to count?
Bob Dylan: "Idiot Wind." Dylan's tricky because he doesn't really have a lot of hits, but this is a well-known song from a well known album. So. I'm counting it.
So, a more interesting question is: what's my least favorite popular Bowie song? "Popular" means, in this case, a song that's frequently on the radio, which any halfway educated musical fan would know, and which is generally liked and admired by the public at large. Basically: a song by an artist you like that a lot of other people like, but you don't. And--that you've never liked. I.e.: it's not a song you've gotten burned out on, or outgrew (e.g."Stairway to Heaven"). It's song you've always disliked--from the first time you heard it. It's the worst good song the artist has ever done.
And then I started thinking this idea of 'worst good' could extend to other bands. I mean, for any band we like, there's probably one or two or their hits, songs that many people other like, that I have never ever cared for. Right? So then I started assembling a list. And here it is: my 'worst good' songs by some of my favorite artists.
Oh--also: the songs have to be artists you generally otherwise admire. You can't pick a band whose work you generally dislike or don't really get into. (So, I'm not listing songs by The Rolling Stones or REM, e.g.)
David Bowie: "Fashion." Probably the only Bowie song where, if I hear it on the radio, I'm switching stations. Unless it's near the bridge ('listen to me/don't listen to me..."). I dig the bridge.
Led Zeppelin: "Kashmir." There's some interview where Robert Plant talks about this song represents, for him, the essence of Led Zeppelin. Bleh. For me it represents the essence of badness.
The Beetles: "Hey Jude." Not only do I like the song, I don't like the story of how the song was written. Maybe if it didn't have that endless outro (Na na na na na......) I'd like it more. But probably not.
The Police: "Can't Stand Losing You."
Neil Young: "A Man Needs a Maid." Maybe this isn't a big enough hit to count?
Bob Dylan: "Idiot Wind." Dylan's tricky because he doesn't really have a lot of hits, but this is a well-known song from a well known album. So. I'm counting it.
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 20
A few days ago my wife, going outside to start her car in the morning (she parks on the street) found it making a horrible and upsetting noise. Something was obviously horribly wrong, and she didn't know what. She knew, though, that she couldn't drive it and so she came back inside and called AAA, to have it towed.
It turns out that the reason it was making such disgusting noises was that its catalytic converter had been stolen. This apparently is a very common crime; catalytic converters have platinum in them (we learned) which can resell for upwards of 500$. It turns out my wife knows half a dozen people who've also had THEIR c converters stolen--one of them from the parking lot of their work, during lunch.
Our insurance paid for it be replaced (minus the deductible) and it turned out to be not a big deal. From now on we're going to have my wife park in our driveway. Also I've attached a series of poison darts to the underside of her car; if anyone tries to mess with it, they'll taste the wrath of justice. But there you go. Life in the city. The criminal element. Rust never sleeps.
It turns out that the reason it was making such disgusting noises was that its catalytic converter had been stolen. This apparently is a very common crime; catalytic converters have platinum in them (we learned) which can resell for upwards of 500$. It turns out my wife knows half a dozen people who've also had THEIR c converters stolen--one of them from the parking lot of their work, during lunch.
Our insurance paid for it be replaced (minus the deductible) and it turned out to be not a big deal. From now on we're going to have my wife park in our driveway. Also I've attached a series of poison darts to the underside of her car; if anyone tries to mess with it, they'll taste the wrath of justice. But there you go. Life in the city. The criminal element. Rust never sleeps.
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 19
Nas's Illmatic has grown on me. I'm starting to get what makes it so celebrated.
Elizabeth Bowen--does anyone read her anymore? She's great!
The most lasting impression I took away form the recent profile of Donald Antrim in the Sunday Times magazine was of Johnathan Franzen and how perpetually irritating and horrible he is. Even though the piece was about how much he'd tried to help out Antrim! I guess that reflects on me, doesn't it?
Elizabeth Bowen--does anyone read her anymore? She's great!
The most lasting impression I took away form the recent profile of Donald Antrim in the Sunday Times magazine was of Johnathan Franzen and how perpetually irritating and horrible he is. Even though the piece was about how much he'd tried to help out Antrim! I guess that reflects on me, doesn't it?
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 18
I've watched most of "You're the Worst" on demand in the last two days. It's a new series that just finished its first season on FX. It's about two misanthropic, generally selfish and unpleasant people who get together for a one-night stand and then gradually, despite their best efforts to the contrary, grow attached to one another. The male hero is a sharp-tongued British writer; the female lead is a blasé and brittle LA publicist. The whole thing's set in LA's uber-hip Silverlake district, which allows it to do some funny riffs on Los Angeles culture (such as it is). It's nothing fantastic, but it holds my interest.
Monday, September 22, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 17
I finished a mystery novel last night (Deadheads by the guy I've been reading on and off--Reginald Hill. Who's great, btw) in which, at the end, the criminal who'd been murdering everybody WAS NOT CAUGHT. He got away! I was surprised to discover how angry I felt, putting it down. I mean, I know it's fiction. I know that Patrick Alderman doesn't exist; that he didn't really get away with anything. But, somehow, it infuriated me. Was it because of the character's skating free of justice, or because I felt tricked and used, somehow, by the writer? A lot of great writing is about defeating or surprising readerly expectations. But in this case, having my expectation so frustrated...it was not enjoyable at all.
I wonder if he got angry letters after the book came out. He must have. I'm angry still.
I heard "Slit Skirts" by Pete Townshend on the radio today. It took me back to high school, when I used to listen to two of his solo albums constantly. And how well the song holds up! Although now, now longer a teen-ager, I find its deep sadness and loneliness affects me in a way it never did in high school. But, I'm going to revisit those albums, I think. "Can't pretend that growing older never hurts."
I wonder if he got angry letters after the book came out. He must have. I'm angry still.
I heard "Slit Skirts" by Pete Townshend on the radio today. It took me back to high school, when I used to listen to two of his solo albums constantly. And how well the song holds up! Although now, now longer a teen-ager, I find its deep sadness and loneliness affects me in a way it never did in high school. But, I'm going to revisit those albums, I think. "Can't pretend that growing older never hurts."
Thursday, September 18, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 16
Very brief post. Courtesy of my brother, I learn that the famed Carl, of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, does a weekly football pick for ESPN. Here's a link to the first two predictions. The first one (Vikings) is my favorite so far.
I'm reading Isaac Babel right now every night before bed. As a consequence my dreams are uneasy phantasmagoric montages involving pillaging Russian soldiers, pogroms, and Stalinist collectivization trials. Well, not really. But I feel like they should be.
Finally, I want everyone to watch this hilarious video I found at The Browser. It'll have the most impact on people familiar with all the stories and legends surrounding the recording of Bowie's (seminal masterpiece) Low, but I feel confident predicting that everyone will enjoy it.
The reason the Visconti figure keeps talking about how he's the co-producer, btw, is because his contributions to the album, have, in fact, been mostly under appreciated over the last 30 years or so.
Man this makes me happy.
I'm reading Isaac Babel right now every night before bed. As a consequence my dreams are uneasy phantasmagoric montages involving pillaging Russian soldiers, pogroms, and Stalinist collectivization trials. Well, not really. But I feel like they should be.
Finally, I want everyone to watch this hilarious video I found at The Browser. It'll have the most impact on people familiar with all the stories and legends surrounding the recording of Bowie's (seminal masterpiece) Low, but I feel confident predicting that everyone will enjoy it.
The reason the Visconti figure keeps talking about how he's the co-producer, btw, is because his contributions to the album, have, in fact, been mostly under appreciated over the last 30 years or so.
Man this makes me happy.
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
Thirty Days of Blogging: Day 15
I don't know what to think of this whole Adrian Peterson thing. On the one hand, the images and stories of his child-rearing methods are undoubtedly disturbing. But on the other hand I doubt his methods--unsavory as they might seem to many people--lie so far beyond the pale of what's expected, or even common, especially within the African-American community. Of course I have only anecdote and second-hand knowledge here, but isn't it more common, in black families, for children to be severely punished for transgressions? And if that is so, if 'whoppings' of the severity we see depicted on TV now w/r/t Peterson, are common, then why is Peterson alone the one who's being made an example of? Because he's an athlete? I don't know. Is the point to effect a widespread change in parenting disciplinary methods, across the entire US? Or just to make an example of one person, so that we can all feel good about how enlightened WE are as parents, because we don't use corporal punishment?
I'm not suggesting, at all, that I find Peterson's methods anything more than appalling. But I find, in this widespread condemnation, an element of smugness and superiority that's off-putting. Too, I'm not sure what purpose it all serves.
I'm not suggesting, at all, that I find Peterson's methods anything more than appalling. But I find, in this widespread condemnation, an element of smugness and superiority that's off-putting. Too, I'm not sure what purpose it all serves.
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